I believe

I believe in true love.

I believe that no matter how hard someone tries, people cannot completely change. 

I believe we should follow our true calling. 

A Poem for the Soul

Vacation
by Rita Dove
I love the hour before takeoff, that stretch of no time,  no home but the gray vinyl seats linked like unfolding paper dolls.  Soon we shall be summoned to the gate, soon enough there’ll be the clumsy procedure of row numbers  and perforated stubs—but for now I can look at these ragtag nuclear families with their cooing and bickering  or the heeled bachelorette trying to ignore a baby’s wail and the baby’s exhausted mother waiting to be called up early while the athlete, one monstrous hand asleep on his duffel bag, listens, perched like a seal trained for the plunge.  Even the lone executive who has wandered this far into summer  with his lasered itinerary, briefcase knocking his knees—even he  has worked for the pleasure of bearing  no more than a scrap of himself  into this hall. He’ll dine out, she’ll sleep late,  they’ll let the sun burn them happy all morning  —a little hope, a little whimsy  before the loudspeaker blurts  and we leap up to become  Flight 828, now boarding at Gate 17.

Both witty and truthful, this poem is one for the aware. I love it because when I am at an airport, I too think of the people; where they are going and what they act like always runs through my mind. It's a lot of fun, almost like playing a game with myself. Ms. Dove captures the essence of the human mind during a usually mundane situation. Vacation reminds us of the waiting before we can go and have fun and reminds us that everyone has somewhere to go and something to accomplish.

"It is difficult to get the news from poetry, yet men die miserably every day for lack of what is found there." - William Carlos Williams

In poetry, we know that the author is trying to show us something. However, we cannot find what that "something" is directly. We must search for what there is to find and in some cases one man can get different "news" than the other. 

Some people try so hard to find what is in poetry that they sometimes lose sight of the simple message. The harder they look into things, the less and less the message means. When searching,  a lesson can mean less and less but when man happens to come across it, it holds a whole new significance. It is like having an epiphany; one cannot search for it, but must let it come to him. 

What is success?

What defines success? After living a fruitful life, I have discovered what success really is. A healthy family, a job well done. As a teenager, I always strove to do the best I could and would be defeated if I failed. I believed that success was the actual act of completing something. Now, I realize that it was the fact that I tried to the extent that I did that made me successful. I went to the college of my choice and with the skills I acquired, did what I love. I was able to work in the theatre industry! Just the fact that I completed my goal in my mind makes me a successful person. I have had adventures, hardships, and happiness, but the one thing that keeps me going is my motivation to be greater than I am. Such a motivation is the key to being a successful person; it makes life more meaningful. 

Although I was not able to be a famous broadway star, I have come to terms with that. I know know that what my father told me as a young girl was not correct. He would tell me how if i became an actress i wouldn't be successful, that i would just waste my time doing commercials and menial work. But, as i grew in the industry i chose, i realized the relationships and joy i was gaining was the real success, not the money or the fame. 

So what is success? Success is satisfaction in one's self, and nothing more than that. 

Describe this!

I have reached the point of salvation. The short climb up occasionally hurts my legs but I soon collapse on my back. It gives me an inviting hug and cushions the dramatic buckling of my body.  As I lie here, the warm pink sea of sheets covers my body and invite me to let my head and mind go. My body unwinds. Slowly, each joint relaxes into the soft pink and orange striped cloud. The cloud's children support my aching neck as I drift off into a land of dreams. I am in a place of comfort and security. The one place I can call my own. 

Was Blind, but Now, I See

 

Both the short story "Cathedral" and the short story "Every Day Use" have interesting points intertwined in their stories. Ignorance to others is a main point in these stories. Although "Cathedral" poses a more literal argument (i. e. the husband putting a stereo-type on the blind man when he himself was "blind"), "Every Day Use" shows how the human can be both ignorant to his culture as well as his "true identity." For example, Dee is ignorant to her culture by not realizing the essence of it is not the fact that her roots are in Africa, but that her roots are in her small American home with her family. It is there that her true identity of a materialistic, narcissistic human being. 

The husband in "Cathedral," on the other hand, tries to turn his ignorance into understanding when he attempts to become blind (in a figurative sense of course). He is making an effort to see in the eyes of another, whereas before he couldn't even have an adequate conversation without producing some level of awkward tension. It is through the small connection that the husband makes with Robert in drawing the cathedrals that poses a breakthrough in the character. He has has, in some sense, a small epiphany. This epiphany never comes for Dee, who refuses to be her own person. She must conform and hide from the world if she is to be accepted, whereas the blind man accepted all people from the start including the husband. 

The interesting thing about these two stories is that on one side the husband starts off "blind" and perseveres to see the light and on the other is Dee who forever stays blind. They show that it is our choices, not necessarily character, that shape who we become as people. We can always change; it is the question of whether we want to or not that makes life so difficult for some and precious for others. 

Barack the Vote

...well we haven't heard those words since November 4th. It's finally time for that monumental inauguration day. Do I think it's over-hyped? Yes. But in a good way. How often do you get a young, non-southern, African-American man as your next president? This inauguration speech will only happen once. I can tell people when I'm older that I witnessed one of the most important days in the history of the United States of America. This over-hype is definitely a good thing--actually if there wasn't this much hype I think I would be a bit concerned. Here's to Bush's last 2 hours in office and change in the great United States. 

A Secret?

We all have secrets-- its the product of our conscience. We feel like we have to mold to a perfect society, therefore we keep our flaws to ourselves. Of course I have kept a secret in my life. Probably the largest was a few weeks ago. I didn't lose sleep over it per say, however it did make me feel bad for the person who told me. I felt helpless because if i told a higher power, it could destroy my friends life, but if i did nothing, she could get hurt in the long run. I battled with myself about how I should handle it and ultimately decided to just tell my parents and discuss the matter with them. I only did this because i trust them, not because i wanted to betray my friend by telling someone when she deliberately told me "do not tell anyone."

Whenever I keep a secret, though, I feel a special bond with the person who told me. They trust me with a deep spot of their personal lives, which is quite an honor if you really think about it. So a secret, I guess, is both a burden and a blessing given by one who finds you remarkably trustworthy and puts their lives in your hands. 

The Scarlet Letter: A Physiological Phenomenon

So far, we have read up to Chapter 13 in The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne. So far, I am surprisingly enjoying this book. As I read, I wonder how Mr. Hawthorne wrote so magically. His intelligence of symbolism is astounding and I cannot fathom how he comes up with such interesting material. The characters he has contrived are thrilling. Hester is such a versatile character; she represents so much of human nature and the inner strength that we all yearn to have. At the same time, Chillingworth is so evil that he emulates the devil to a certain extent. It makes me as a reader play with how he will change the lives of the townspeople; he has truly gotten into my head, which I guess was Hawthorne's intent. 

My only complaint is that I am rushing through the book to get the reading done. I may actually want to read it again at my own leisure to really get what Hawthrone is trying to convey. Then, it will be more enjoyable and I won't have to worry about getting the assignment done.  

more resolutions

A few days ago I posted some New Years resolutions. Considering I'm having a horrible morning, I have come to the realization that there are a few more I need to add to my list. Lets call these my week-late resolutions:

1. get to bed early. I went to sleep after finishing my homework at 1 last night and I've never been more frazzled. 

2. dont miss the bus--note to self: makes mom angry

3. Do less. I do too much. I'm running talent night, am going to be in 2 shows, have SAT tutors twice a week, I'm secretary for my BBYO (youth group) chapter, and to top it off i take voice lessons. Something's gotta give. 

4. Chill out. Im going to get into college no matter what, so I need to stop stressing that I'm not going to get in anywhere and my life will be ruined forever. 

5. Stop procrastinating. To begin this resolution I am going to work on my creative writing that is due tomorrow that I have been stupidly putting off. 

that is all. 

Happy 2009!

It's 2009. Time again for those pesky resolutions that we never seem to keep. I was actually thinking about this a few days ago, which usually never happens to me. Anyway, here's what I came up with:

1. Stop living in the past

I know this is a... let's put it... vague resolution, but anyone who knows me well will probably encourage me to keep this one. I don't need to forget my amazing 2008, just stop talking about it so much. I've decided to move on with my life. To achieve this goal will be quite difficult, I know that for a fact. I need to do this so I can once again start living and enjoying myself instead of wanting to hide from what I have grown to be. I'm not really sure how i will accomplish this, but know that when I put my mind into something, giving up is not an option 

2. Study hard 

This is pretty self explanatory--it's junior year. I have to buckle down, turn off Facebook, turn off the music and the cell phone, and concentrate. These next few months will be hard, but I know if I can do those few things, it will better myself in the long run.

Happy New Year, Happy Resolutions, Happy Life

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